It takes courage to write and to publish, especially when what we write is personal, as it often can be on Substack, so kudos to you for continuing to do it, Hoang, despite the voices in your head that say it doesn't matter or others are better, etc. We all have them--I know I do. The metaphor in comparing learning to swim later in life with decisions about moving is apt. The fear is so strong that even trusting others you love to "catch you" doesn't always work. But still, to keep going despite the fear is really the story of living. There is always fear, and, unless you're simply one of those people who thrives on it (I'm certainly not), you have to find a way to keep going despite it. The worst that can happen is you change your mind about something later. But worse than that is often the regret you feel about NOT having tried something because you were too afraid. I look forward to reading about how your and your husband's future plans develop.
Thanks for reading, Ruth. This was quite scary, both in thinking about it and in executing it. We do have some time - we still have another BIG international trip to take before we look at actually doing anything. One thing I did not mention in the post is that we decided on a Plan B... that is, if the first option doesn't work out, then we know exactly what to do next! which made me feel better. I'm learning to lean into the idea that things won't always work out exactly the way you planned (because that's life, right?) and that's okay.
I can understand how scary that must be. Our lives often don't work out as we plan, and we have to make the best of it. Sometimes something better comes out of it, but not always, and we just have to adjust to it. I think many people--and I'm one of them--don't have a plan for their lives. Things just happen and then they decide what to do. My life went like that, beginning with meeting my husband in a used record store in the Haight in San Francisco. Maybe I'll write that story someday.
It takes courage to write and to publish, especially when what we write is personal, as it often can be on Substack, so kudos to you for continuing to do it, Hoang, despite the voices in your head that say it doesn't matter or others are better, etc. We all have them--I know I do. The metaphor in comparing learning to swim later in life with decisions about moving is apt. The fear is so strong that even trusting others you love to "catch you" doesn't always work. But still, to keep going despite the fear is really the story of living. There is always fear, and, unless you're simply one of those people who thrives on it (I'm certainly not), you have to find a way to keep going despite it. The worst that can happen is you change your mind about something later. But worse than that is often the regret you feel about NOT having tried something because you were too afraid. I look forward to reading about how your and your husband's future plans develop.
Thanks for reading, Ruth. This was quite scary, both in thinking about it and in executing it. We do have some time - we still have another BIG international trip to take before we look at actually doing anything. One thing I did not mention in the post is that we decided on a Plan B... that is, if the first option doesn't work out, then we know exactly what to do next! which made me feel better. I'm learning to lean into the idea that things won't always work out exactly the way you planned (because that's life, right?) and that's okay.
I can understand how scary that must be. Our lives often don't work out as we plan, and we have to make the best of it. Sometimes something better comes out of it, but not always, and we just have to adjust to it. I think many people--and I'm one of them--don't have a plan for their lives. Things just happen and then they decide what to do. My life went like that, beginning with meeting my husband in a used record store in the Haight in San Francisco. Maybe I'll write that story someday.
You just described most of my twenties haha. Things happened and I sort of had to…roll with it. Would love to hear your story though!